Toaru Majutsu no Index-tan Episode 03

Sketch 1: Kamijou Touma and Ika Index-tan
The episode starts with Touma receiving a call from Komoe, telling him to go to his make-up class, naturally, Touma is indignant about this. Touma then begins taking out the mattress of his bed to air it outside on his balcony, all the while lamenting his misfortune. While there, Touma discovers an incredibly small nun with a symbol over her eye and a seemingly weird hat shaped like a squid's mantle, much to his shock, commenting on how that little squid girl on his balcony railings may be the that invaded that "Nico" place.

The little girl awakens due to hunger, and tells Touma that she is hungry while dripping ink from her mouth. Suddenly she sneezes and gushes out black ink from her nose and mouth. Surprised by this, Touma takes a step back, while commenting on how they may have been invaded. The girl starts squirming around and drolling on top of the railing, saying on how squids build their body with a low fat diet with core proteins, before being promptly taken away by a small kitten that suspiciously looks like Sphynx.however, the girl is almost taken away by a small flying bird. Right before an audible sound of meowing and flesh being rendered is heard, a very loud "geso" is heard from the girl. In the end, Touma is still unbelieving of the absurd situation that just occurred, asking if the series has been saved from invasion.

Sketch 2: Kamijou Touma and Sphynx
Nighttime, Touma spends the night looking for Index with Sphynx tagging along. Soon, Sphynx breaks away from him and Touma goes to follow Index's cat to a hotel. While turning a corner to where Sphynx went, he finds another cat instead from a certain series with defective detectives, and trips due to surprise.

Sketch 3: Index-tan on Bon odori
On the roof of a certain hospital, several laterns and ropes for a bon odori festival liberally decorates the place, much to the bound Index-tan's excitement. Here, Index-tan states that the bon dance is a traditional Japanese festival, but says that the youngsters today can't fit in with the tradition, as it is not exactly popular with them, which concerns her.

Her face goes aglowing when she says what would happen if everyone suddenly started practicing dancing, but then changes into a more arrogant expression as she mimics a response for her previous question, saying that they'll say it would be stupid. She then immediately mimics a distraught female, saying that the girls would start crying as a response. Her mood suddenly changes into something foreboding, as she says that as a response that the guys would come out to comfort them, and then after the festival they would start going out, at this point Index-tan's voice change into something deeper.

The lanterns started glowing and a melancholic tone is played on a lyre by Yamisaka Ouma who passes her by. In a condescending tone, Ika Index-tan gives out a curioused sound with her still deep voice. Suddenly, an elevator signal is heard, and she starts getting excited, as apparently Touma has arrived, prompting her to hop on her knees towards his location.

Meanwhile, Ouma is left alone on the roof, still playing that wisful tune while overlooking the blue tinted Academy City skyline.

Sketch 4: A Certain Exciting Night Life of Saten Ruiko
Kuroko, though injured, proceeds to pick up a lamp to strike Awaki with, she begins rushing towards her, but then the scene is immediately cut.

A girl with a flower on her princess cut hairstyle is preparing soup, supposedly for her dinner whilst swinging her head lightly back and forth to her humming of a maddeningly incomprehensible tune. It's probably French.

The scene cuts back, to a coin being fired like a Railgun by Misaka Mikoto, destroying the floor of the building where an incredibly injured Kuroko lies. The room is then filled with a blazing light, and with that awakening call, Kuroko already knows who is responsible for such an awesome display of power, her Oneesama. However, Awaki's building crushing teleportation begins to take shape sucking in objects in its distortion of space. Kuroko pleads to Mikoto to not come near, however, the floor collapses below her and she falls. Here, Kuroko confirms that it is indeed her Oneesama who used her power to save her, she shouts her name, but the scene is then cut.

With a towel on her head, the girl from before stretches her legs up and the lays it down again, as she enjoys an evening bath while still humming the incomprehensible tune.

The scene is returned to Accelerator using his vector powers to create whirling streams of air as wings to stay afloat. Here, amidst chaos and destruction, falling glass and Remnant parts, Accelerator prepares his stance for a punch. With a smug smile on his face, Accelerator declares to Awaki go back as there is only One-way road in front of her. With this, he punches her in the face, propelling her several meters, making her hit a hard wall, and begins to fall, the scene is the cut again.

The young lady is no longer humming the tune as she has fallen soundly asleep. She turns her body, displaying her slender figure, and mutters in her sleep: "Are you wearing panites~?"

Sketch 4: Stiyl Magnus is a pyromaniac
In the orange-lit halls of the Church of Orsola, Agnese Sanctis confronts Stiyl Magnus and the fiery embers that blow towards her. Stiyl gives a small grunt and throws away the cigarette he was smoking to the floor. Agnese is appalled by this as he is littering, while the used cigarette falls to the floor, slowly. Agnese comments on how there are many cigarette butts in France, but then the cigarette finally hits the floor.

With this cue, Stiyl commands is "Hyper" Innocentius to go. With that command, Innocentius bellows an incredible shriek from his mouth and attacks. As a response all the nuns with Agnese respond that he shouldn't use that indoors, as they scream.

Apparently having a new cigarette to smoke while everything is burning, Stiyl nonchalantly says that everything's goung to burn, and then winks.

Sketch 5: Index-tan and Agnese-tan
Touma is walking during a wonderful evening with Index-tan on top of his head eating sandwhiches she gets from nowhere, while being accompanied by a shy Angelene twiddling her fingers, with Agnese-tan on top of her head and carrying her Lotus Wand.

After grunting a few times, Agnese-tan complains that Index was supposed to be the only one who was turn small during this episode. Index-tan finally finishes eating and states that Agnses-tan is correct and because of that her appeal may go down a bit, and applies her "de geso~" verbal tic despite not being a squid girl anymore. Agnese-tan smugly sighs and mocks the anime. As a response, Agnese-tan uses her Lotus Wand to attack Touma's crotch. Apparently hurt yet still standing because of this, Touma turns to Agnese-tan to be careful as he got hurt down "there".

Index-tan states then obvious regarding Touma getting her in the crotch, because of her knowledge in medical science she states that it is probably a terrible illness, however, she then blushes on how the reason Touma is hurt down there is of "other" reasons. However, Index-tan suddenly realizes something and becomes angered. Meanwhile, Touma asks an uncaring Agnese-tan to give a follow-up instead of staying silent. Agnese-tan however states that she has already talked plenty.

Finally, Index-tan speaks up and asks Touma if he got distracted because of Agnese-tan. Not waiting for an answer, Index-tan begins pulling his hair and saying "get bald" and "idiot". Meanwhile, Agnese-tan is annoyed that she been misunderstand because of Touma, and begins using her Lotus wand again and again.

In a wonderful evening, Touma walks with Angelene (who hasn't said a thing) with the two midgets on top of their heads, while being attack and apparently indifferent to the aformentioned midgets' attacks on him. Touma sighs as he keeps walking.

Sketch 6: We watch Shirai Kuroko and Uiharu Kazari discuss things
In a certain restaurant, Kuroko bemoans on the fact that her Oneesama has become interested to the opposite sex, and then wonders if Kazari who is eating her parfait is listening.

Kazari confirms this, as she eats another scoop. Later, Kuroko then comments on how the flowers on Kazari's head have become a bit too cute lately, to which Kazari responds that she too has begun to take notice, and compares it to becoming something like a flower arrangement. Kazari then goes on about a "staff member" she met online who commented on how he always "forget" to draw a few of them.

Kuroko says that staff members who leak inside information without knowing is pretty stupid. She sips her tea and comments on their lowly loves for having to need other people acknowledge their existence by leaking information. She smiles and looks at Kazari.

Kazari tries to return back to topic and after eating another scoop says that flowers are hard to draw. Kuroko comments that Kazari has no right to say that because she has many flowers on her head. Kazari does not respond as she is still enjoying her parfait. Trying to break the ice, Kuroko asks what she would do during the winter, to which Kazari responds that the flowers on her head are artificial, as she begins eating her parfait again. Kuroko just gives snobbish grunts for the rest of the scene.

Sketch 7: Kanzaki Kaori
Kaori arrives on a scene while a bouncing and moaning sound is played over the bouncing of her boobs.The Knights of England comes forth before her. They just gawk at her, while she leaps up into the air and attack them using Nanasen several times. Meanwhile, the observing Tsuchimikado Motoharu leaves the scene for some apparent reason as Kaori's fond use of Nanasen on her enemies continue.

Finally, the beating stops, as the knights lay on top of the riprap stones, however, Touma is apparently one of the victims of Kaori's onslaught.

Back in a certain hospital, Touma is recuperating on his bed. Kaori reaches her hand to fiddle with Touma's bangs, which disturbs him. This prompts Kaori to leave immediately, however, she leaves a present and a letter addressed to him. The letter reads that Kaori is sorry for always causing Touma trouble, and she attacked him because she was drunk, although she doesn't remember it, until Motoharu told her. Continuing with the letter, it reads that she will atone for it somehow— with her body.

Sketch 8: False ending
The ending song starts as images of the characters pan across the screen, however, Yamisaka Ouma's picture moves on its own, and is even pointed out. The scene changes to a crying Yamisaka Ouma.

The ending song continues before Touma, Index and Mikoto's paths converge.

Sketch 9: Misaka Imouto
A Radio Noise clone is inside a darkened room with only the computer's screen giving any source, while playing something. An announcement is written below the screen regarding that she is playing a game with a bunch of cute girls.

The scene cuts to a black screen with a comment in white about how there was originally supposed to be a pun on Ore no Imōto ga Konna ni Kawaii Wake ga Nai, but the writer couldn't think of anything.

Sketch 10: Ignored in bliss
The sketch show scenes during the Daihaseisai. The first one features Fukiyose Seiri lecturing Touma, while Himegami Aisa is in the back being pointed as someone who was not mentioned this episode, while a laugh track is played during that part.

The same treatment is later applied to Tsukuyomi Komoe as she was also not mentioned during this episode.

Adapted From
Parodies of various Toaru Majutsu no Index anime episodes, specifically:
 * Toaru Majutsu no Index-tan Episode 02
 * Toaru Majutsu no Index Episode 03
 * Toaru Majutsu no Index II Episode 01
 * Toaru Majutsu no Index II Episode 05
 * Toaru Majutsu no Index II Episode 07
 * Toaru Majutsu no Index II Episode 08

Characters
By order of appearance
 * Kamijou Touma
 * Index as Index-tan
 * Sphynx
 * Yamisaka Ouma
 * Shirai Kuroko
 * Musujime Awaki
 * Saten Ruiko
 * Misaka Mikoto
 * Accelerator
 * Stiyl Magnus
 * Agnese Sanctis
 * Angelene
 * Uiharu Kazari
 * Kanzaki Kaori
 * Knights of England
 * Tsuchimikado Motoharu
 * Tsukuyomi Komoe
 * Last Order (in the false ending only)
 * Fukiyose Seiri (in the false ending only)
 * Ridovia Lorenzetti (in the false ending only)
 * Oriana Thomson (in the false ending only)
 * Misaka Misuzu (in the false ending only)
 * Orsola Aquinas (in the false ending only)
 * Radio Noise clone
 * Himegami Aisa
 * Aogami Pierce

Abilities

 * Railgun - Misaka Mikoto, level 5
 * Move Point - Musujime Awaki, level 4
 * Redirection - Accelerator, level 5
 * Innocentius - Stiyl Magnus
 * Lotus Wand - Agnese Sanctis (Agnese-tan)
 * Nanasen - Kanzaki Kaori

Locations

 * Academy City
 * Kamijou Residence
 * Saten Residence
 * Church of Orsola
 * Joseph's Coffee and Restaurant
 * Heaven Canceller's Hospital
 * A Certain High School

Trivia

 * Toaru Majutsu no Index-tan was released on the first limited edition DVDs and BDs of the first season.
 * The opening parodies the appearance of Index to Touma from the second episode of 'Toaru Majutsu no Index-tan''.
 * Saten Ruiko appearance in this episode maybe a reference to her popularity in the Toaru Kagaku no Railgun anime (being a main character despite originally being a minor character) as well as not appearing as well not being referenced in the second season of Toaru Majutsu no Index.
 * Uiharu Kazari and Shirai Kuroko discussing and referencing things over at Joseph's Coffee and Restaurant are standard sketches in the Toaru Kagaku no Railgun anime specials. Furthermore, the scene answers the question of whether or not Kazari's flowers are real or not, for those who have yet to read the novels.
 * Despite saying Nanasen, Kaori's first attack on the Knights is more similar to her Yuisen.
 * The scene where Touma fails to wake up before Kaori leaves him a letter is a reference to the letter Kaori ripped up near the end of episode 5 of the second season. It also references Shizuka Itou's drunkenness again.
 * Himegami Aisa's irrelevance in the series is once referenced during the final moments of the episode, as she doesn't appear at all in the episode alongside Komoe.

Cultural References

 * The entire episode references Shinryaku! Ika Musume, an anime that aired at the same time as the second season of Toaru Majutsu no Index. The show features the title character, a literal squid girl (Ika Musume is her name which can be translated as Squid Girl) trying to invade humanity as punishment for polluting the sea. Ika Musume bears a strong resemblance to Index, furthermore there is even a mini version Ika in the show. Apart from the looks, Index-tan borrows a few traits from Ika Musume from this episode such as her ink spitting and most notably her verbal tic "de geso" or "geso" which means or is "food made out of squid arms (tentacles)." Index-tan says geso several times in the episode, most especially during the eyecatches where she yells it.
 * Touma references Nico Nico Douga, a popular Japanese video sharing website.
 * The cat that Touma finds instead of Sphynx is Kamaboko from Tantei Opera Milky Holmes, a JC Staff anime that aired at the same time as the second season of the Toaru Majutsu no Index anime.
 * Index-tan discusses the Bon Odori, an important Japanese festival to honor the departed.
 * Aisa quotes her version of René Descartes' famous quote, "I think, therefore I am." It means that someone who wonder whether or not they exist is, in and of itself, proof that they exist (because, at the very least, there is an "I" who does the thinking). In Aisa's version it is, "I get ignored, therfore I am," which would mean since people are willfully ignoring her existence, it is in and of itself proof that she does exist.
 * The song that Ruiko's hums incomprehensibly is similar to While Strolling Through the Park One Day.
 * Agnese-tan is a reference to her voice actor Kugimiya Rie, the original Shana-tan.
 * Near the final moment of the episode, a message appears regarding a joke regarding Ore no Imōto ga Konna ni Kawaii Wake ga Nai, an anime that aired at the same time as the second season of Toaru Majutsu no Index and had the same publisher as the Toaru Majutsu no Index Light Novels. Moreover, both series promoted each other heavily up to and during their airing, with voice actors from the anime narrating promotional videos. Kosaka Kirino, the eponymous little sister would eventually appear as a secret cameo in the Toaru Majutsu no Index PSP game.

Animation Trivia

 * The episode features entirely new animation and backgrounds for Saten Ruiko's appearance alone.

Quotes

 * Touma: "Isn't this the squid thing that invaded the OP on Nico-something...?" -upon discovering Ika Index-tan.
 * Ika Index-tan: "If you let me fill up my stomach, I'd be really happy ~de geso." -Ika Index-tan adding a squiddly final particle at the end of her sentence.
 * Touma: "Don't tell me we've been invaded." -Touma on the prospect of squids taking over.
 * Touma: "Was the "Toaru" series saved from being invaded." -Touma after Ika Index-tan is taken away.
 * Index-tan: "Geso~!" -said several times.
 * Ruko: "Are you wearing panties~?" -Ruiko sleeptalking.
 * Stiyl: "Everything's going to burn."
 * Agnese-tan: "Index was the only one who was supposed to turn mini in this anime" -Agnese-tan commenting on her smallness.
 * Kazari: "A staff member I met online was muttering without knowing, "I always forget to draw a few, it's tough..."" -Kazari on JC Staff's sloppy character artists.
 * Kuroko: "To be honest, I think staff members who start muttering inside information without realizing it are pretty stupid. Well, I consider them people who need to go out and have people acknowledge their information to even properly establish their existence." -Kuroko on the r'aison d'etre of some people.
 * Kazari: "These are artificial flowers!" -Kazari confirms something known to some people for a very long time.
 * Kaori: "I'm sorry for always causing you trouble. Even if I was drunk, to attack an ally... But I don't remember it... Until Tsuchimikado told me. I will atone for this somehow. Um... I'll atone for it with my body." -Kaori's letter.
 * Sign: "I was originally thinking of making a pun on "Ore no Misaka-Imouto ga Konna ni Kawaii wake ga nai" but I couldn't think of anything." -writers on creativity.
 * Sign: "Unmentioned this episode." -on Aisa and Komoe.